Friday, October 03, 2003

If I went to an Arnold Schwarzenegger rally.....

As Arnold Schwarzenegger comes to the Bay Area to promote his campaign, here's what I would do if I were so inclined.

I would engage in conversation with Schwarzenegger supporters. As a documentary producer, I often interview people with a video camera, capturing their comments for posterity. As a journalist, rather than a protester, I'm more likely to engage in honest dialogue.

I would try to find the most rabid Arnold fans. Here's the type of conversation that might occur if I was inclined to attend an Arnold rally:

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ME: So tell me, why are you excited about Arnold Schwarzenegger running for governor?

FAN: I think he's best chance we have in removing Gray Davis from office.

ME: What's your biggest complaint with Gray Davis?

FAN: Gray Davis mismanaged the state budget, the energy crisis, and is trying impose a lot of unnecessary taxes.

ME: Do you consider yourself an active member of the Republican party?

FAN: I am a proud member of the Republican party.

ME: When Bill Clinton was in office, how did you feel about the Monica Lewinsky scandal?

FAN: I thought it was a disgrace to the American people. That man made mockery of the office of the president.

ME: How do you feel about the accusations against Arnold that he's been known to grope a lot of women without their approval?

FAN: I think it's completely overblown. They are trying to blackmail the man with unsubstantial rumors. It's a witch hunt.

ME: Do you feel there are any parallels with Bill Clinton and Arnold Schwarzenegger?

FAN: Not at all. They are completely different situations.

ME: Because Clinton was involved in consensual activity and Schwarzenegger was involved in non-consensual activity?

FAN: Listen, Bill Clinton lied to the American people, and as the president of the United States he should have known better.

ME: As an actor, the very nature of the job requires them to be someone to be something they're not. They are masters of illusion. How do you know when Arnold is telling the truth?

FAN: Arnold apologized for what he did in the past, and that's good enough for me. All these women that are accusing Arnold are just trying to get attention.

ME: When a multi-million dollar star wants to fondle a make-up artist, a wardrobe girl or production assistant without their consent, who do you think is more likely to have someone fired?

FAN: I .. eh....

ME: Why do you think like a big star would grope these women? It's the same reason why a dog would lick his nuts. Because he can.

FAN: Excuse me, I've got to go...

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E.P. Friday, October 03, 2003